Someone actually works at Forrester!

Over the last two days, very little has happened on Bold and the Beautiful. Bill Spencer's will was read; he left some gag gifts for Donna and Clark and half of his empire to daughter Karen. I don't know how permanent Karen's stay will be, but I wouldn't mind if the writers play around with a Karen the cougar storyline, with yummy Thomas as her unsuspecting prey.

Yummy Thomas.

Beyond the making out with Thomas part, it could be a good storyline, given her resemblance to Ridge's first wife, Caroline;the possibility of the breakdown of Karen's relationship with Stephanie because Stephanie, being Stephanie, wouldn't stand for an older woman getting her groove back with Ridge's son; and ramifications for Taylor, given that she engaged in a similar relationship with Rick, who could be considered Thomas' contemporary.

As expected, Eric completely shrugged off Rick's deplorable behavior and continued to insist that Rick and Ridge can and should work together. Ridge stormed out, kiboshing Pam's efforts to get Ridge's signature on some very important paperwork. Pam was thwarted again when she called Ridge and was told that he was too busy to deal with business (read: too busy trying to pull Brooke's head out of Rick's ass).

Poor Pam... however, it was the first time, in many months, that I saw anyone doing anything resembling work at Forrester Creations.

And she cocked it up.

But at least she was upset about it and determined to fix it. Finally, someone I can truly relate to, especially the twisting oneself into knots because Douchebag Boss isn't on top of his own shit. It's kinda bad that Pam seems to cower to Ridge, despite being his aunt and not beefing about her unjust stay in stir because of Ridge's son (hot Thomas). If it was me, I probably would've gotten pretty snotty about things, throwing out that I am the only person who works at Forrester, no matter what Payroll thinks and that I'm willing to jump off the hamster wheel any minute. But of course, I'm just a viewer, and if it was real life, I would probably suffer in silence just like Pam.

Anyway, the important papers that Pam was freaking out about turned out to be Ridge and Brooke's marriage license. Riddled with typos, the license was deemed invalid. Pam told Stephanie, hoping that Stephanie would get her out of this jam. Why was it that Stephanie had just came from Taylor's and had Taylor's pontifications about not going after a married Ridge/marriage is sacred/breaking up a marriage is a line I would never cross still ringing in her head?

PRETTY DAMN CONVENIENT, B & B writers.

And quite frankly, kinda sloppy.

Rashida didn't make the cover, but she made the cut!!!

People's yearly Most Beautiful issue is out. The usual suspects were there: Brad, Angelina, Halle, George, JLo and Beyonce. Some welcomed new faces: Jon Hamm, Freida Pinto, Dev Patel. And some obvious behind the scenes PR machinations - Chelsea Handler. Chelsea's pretty, but it's pretty interesting how she's showing up in a bunch of photospreads within a relatively short period of time. While annoying, it doesn't compare to Melissa Rycroft's inclusion; yet another example of Dumped Chick guilting her way into People Magazine.

But Rashida Jones made the cut, as she should. Included in the Pretty Funny section with the likes of Fey, Poehler, and De Rossi, I'm glad that People Magazine didn't have their heads up their asses regarding Rashida. And here's hoping that Hollywood will follow People's lead and get Rashida in their film projects.

Christina Applegate was selected as the most beautiful; I think she was worthy, although I can't shake the feeling that it was more about her double mastectomy than anything else. Mind you, Drew Barrymore and Kate Hudson were the most recent Most Beautiful covergirls and although they were attractive enough for the title, they also had projects they needed to promote (Words and Music and Fools Gold/My Best Friend's Girl).

I do respect People for attempting to add some depth to this yearly celebrity fellatio; however, was it necessary for them to include a comment about Christina standing Brad Pitt up 20 years ago?I mean, couldn't People allow the princesses to marinate on an issue that could actually touch their lives (breast cancer) versus regaling them with tales of a TV girl humiliating Brad Pitt?

And on that note... Jennifer Aniston wasn't on the list; neither wasn't her ex, Douchebag Peeboy!!!!

If Rick's wearing Ridge's clothes...

then Rick is halfway there, in terms of assuming his much-desired place in his mother's... heart.

But the Rick-Brooke storyline is of little consequence, especially since Brooke is determined to bury her head in the sand.

And Thomas was on again. I feel like a total perv, mainly because he looks so young. But I seem to remember a few years ago when I thought he was all eyes. His eyes seemed disproportionately larger in my memory. But now, with the haircut and the scruff, I find him unbelievably yummy, and I plan to enjoy it for as long as it will last. I think it will last, but the actor does have a Leo Dicaprio/James McAvoy boy-man face going on and for me, Dicaprio and McAvoy's attractiveness is or has already gone downhill. Fingers crossed that Thomas is merely a baby face.

Now for the good stuff...

Eric and Stephanie finally had a face to face since Jackie M.'s fashion show triumph; unfortunately, it was due to the death of a mutual friend. Since I am relatively new to B&B, I have no idea who Bill Spencer was to the Forresters; however, his passing was a pretty good catalyst for the tense exchange between Eric and Stephanie.

Eric came to Stephanie's office, offering to escort Stephanie to Bill's funeral, an offer that seemed kinda disingenuous. IMO, this gesture was a feeler -- Eric was testing for something and I have no clue what it was. When Stephanie refused Eric's offer, Eric had to get all subliminal and reminded Stephanie that her attitude was the reason why he fired her. And Stephanie reaffirmed that she accepted her firing and that she doesn't want Eric. She stated that she she's no longer his wife, lover, business partner or friend. While Stephanie had expressed variations of that same theme in the past, for some reason, she sounded like she actually meant it. Actually, she did mean it; unfortunately, I don't think that Eric believed it or fully fathomed what Stephanie's choice will mean to him.

For weeks, I've dogged Eric for his @$$hat decisions: keeping Rick as president of Forrester; firing Stephanie; encouraging the Rick/Steffy relationship; not correcting Donna's "Out with the old/in with the young" declaration to the media; and numerous other questionable or flat-out bad choices. I was right to do so; however, a wave of sadness came over me watching Eric and Stephanie together. Eric is having his Freaky Friday -- putting on a facade of male bravado in front of ex-wife Stephanie, who knows where the bodies are buried but opted to vault it, while confiding his dick problems with new, younger wife, Donna, who proceeded to broadcast this change to her sisters. Time could improve Donna, with respect to being Eric's wife and a viable contributor to Forrester Creations, but if she doesn't know that what she knows is very little, then the current deevolution will continue. And sadly, Eric doesn't seem to know that he doesn't know very much either.

At any rate, while Stephanie articulated her position, I felt really sad for her, and at the same time, I wished that Taylor was there to bare witness to a master course of cutting an albatross loose.

I hope Stephanie sticks to her guns.

Coincidentally...

TV Land aired the TVLand Awards last Sunday.

The best part - the musical tribute to Sid and Marty Krofft. I prided myself on having a good memory when it comes to classic television shows, but I was obviously too young to remember H.R. Pufnstuf, Sigmund, Land of the Lost, and the numerous other Krofft shows featured in the musical production number. I never laughed so hard in my life. The Krofft tribute was made for the award show production number treatment; when I think back on this year's Oscars production number, it was completely bush league compared to the Krofft tribute. The Oscars had a Tony winner, a Grammy winner, and numerous MTV Video/Movie nominees -- none of them fit to shine H.R's Pufnstuf's patent leather boots. Good job conceiving a production number that was entertaining and actually seemed organic.

The worst part - Dr. Phil presenting the Innovator award to the cast of Married with Children. First, Married with Children was denied a series finale; now, they received this well-deserved television accollade from the pompous jackass who makes me want to turn off my television permanently. Married with Children was another sitcom that I grew up on. And while I loved the Cosby Show, Married with Children was a fantastic example of broad, dark comedy, with occasional hints of heart. But mainly, that show was funny as hell. It was one of the few sitcoms during that period that had their female characters give as much as they got. And watching it now, with more mature eyes, even the later No Ma'am years were as funny as most comedies that are on the air today. And the montage really didn't do the show justice. Couldn't they have included the clip when Al and Peg went on the game show and Peg was mercilessly spun by Al? That was one clip that personified the spirit of Married with Children; there were numerous others, like when Al, wrapped in bed sheets, screamed for Bud and Kelly to save him from Peg's lascivious designs.

Married with Children deserved much better.

Levi... you've got troubles, Mac!!

Last week, Levi Johnston appeared on Larry King to discuss his custody problems. Unfortunately, his mother and sister were there for support -- unfortunate because like the Palins, they appear to be strong and stubborn. And since the Palin women and the Johnston women opted to take their grievances to the media, their true objectives will be perverted and reduced to yet another Kitson's T-shirt fad.

Levi... it's time to stop doing media and get to the business of getting visitation rights through the legal system. Forget about any sort of modeling and television work in Hollywood because Hollywood will only be interested in estrogen contingent of your crew. If you insist that modeling is your destiny, do it within Alaska or maybe even Canada.

Good luck, dude... and I really mean that.

That Ole Brooke Magic!!!

Not much happened on Bold and the Beautiful today. Brooke called Taylor desperate and pathetic; Rick invited himself into Brooke and Ridge's house; Ridge stormed out when Brooke didn't bounce Rick's ass out of the house; and Ridge landed at Taylor's house, for an evening of family fun with Taylor, their children, and Stephanie.

Thomas was there... purrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.....

Didn't care for Stephanie campaigning for Taylor. Taylor can do better than Ridge; he's too damn wishy-washy.

As for Brooke, she really needs to be careful with Rick. I definitely got a macking vibe from him towards his mother and the scary thing is that Brooke, who is adept at picking up that vibe, didn't catch it this time.

Open your eyes, Brooke, or you'll find yourself in a root cellar, courtesy of your overly devoted son.

My Benjamin Button fast - week 4 (done)

Nine more days, give or take, before Benjamin Button hits the stores. I pre-ordered my DVD on Amazon.com -- fingers crossed that it will arrive on time or a little early.

This week, I planned to rent flicks which featured both Brad Pitt and selected Benjamin Button cast members. I already own Babel, which featured Cate Blanchett and Ellie Fanning as his wife and daughter, respectively; kinda weird that Cate and Ellie were Benjamin's Daisy at different ages. I also have Burn After Reading, co-starring Tilda Swinton. More than anything, BAR proves Pitt and Swinton's versatility; the idea of dim bulb Chad going up against icicle through the eye Katie is all kinds of wrong. The Benjamin/Elizabeth romance, on the other hand, was touching and deliciously naughty.

Legends of the Fall and Snatch were possible rentals. In Legends, Julia Ormond was Susanna, the object of the Ludlow men's affection; in BB, she was Caroline, Benjamin's daughter. And in Snatch, Jason Flemyng was Darren, one of barefisted boxer Mickey's buds -- he rocked one helluva mullet in that flick; in BB, he was Benjamin's absent father, Thomas. Fight Club and Se7en, showcasing David Fincher's direction, were possibilities, but I just rented FC and could really get sucked into it again and Se7en is very difficult to watch. Although the death didn't happen onscreen, Fincher did a too good of a job drawing a mind picture of how that poor prostitute went out.

5 7 6 seems out of the question because of time constraints. BB may arrive early; I just got another MST3K box set; and I have babysitting duties next weekend. An energetic 2 year old who apparently likes musicals like Hairspray. I thought about renting a High School Musical, but I don't want to pull that little girl into a cult that could get expensive for her mother down the line. More than likely, I'll bring my Hairspray DVD, but I'm hoping that lil girl will run herself silly around the house. She's a good little girl, but her energy is just insane.

CBS Sunday Morning nearly derailed me. The show featured a segment about photographer Walker Evans' personal postcard collection. I literally heard Alexandre Desplat's Postcards in my head; that piece of music was in my favorite scene of the whole movie. But I will continue to not listen to the soundtrack. I want to stay intellectually pure until I have the DVD in hand.

I know that I sound like a Trekkie or an overzealous freak fan, but I've been indecisive when it comes to selecting a favorite film. Benjamin Button snuck up on me and is not letting go.

May 5th can't come too quickly.

Bea Arthur... gone

She was 86 years old and suffering from cancer.

But still... hearing of her loss was pretty upsetting. She didn't look well at her recent appearance at the TV Land Awards, but there is a tendency to push grave thoughts out of one's mind.

I literally grew up on the Golden Girls. I was about 11 years old when the show premiered and about to turn 19 when it ended. It aired at 9pm Saturday nights and quite frankly, I am amazed that my mom allowed us to watch it. At the time, a lot of the jokes flew completely over my head; but as I grew older and watched it in syndication or on Lifetime, I marveled at how raunchy and witty it really was. It was one of the few sitcoms that the dialogue stayed with you; usually, it was Blanche, Rose, or Sophia's. But Dorothy was all about the delivery and timing.

Last year, the Golden Girls was the perfect comfort food for me. I was laid off from my job and feeling really down, especially when my job search went from weeks to months. That show was worth getting up for; it was even worth staying up after 1 a.m. I heard that Lifetime gave up their rights to show GGs; therefore I caught as many episodes when I could and fortunately, my local video store has the DVDs.

As for my favorite Dorothy episodes, it's very tough because Dorothy had fantastic moments in nearly every episode. Whether she was preventing Sophia from saying something embarrassing, enduring another one of Rose's St. Olaf stories, or dealing with Blanche's incessant bouts of vanity, Bea Arthur made the most of her screen time. But any episode involving Stan, or Dorothy and Sophia sharing a room, or the girls having a late night pow-wow over cheesecake were favorites. But I have to say that the following stuck out:

• Love Me Tender, the episode when Dorothy discovers the joy of 'sport nookie', as Sophia characterized it, with a plain looking, but utterly irresistible man
• Sick and Tired, when Dorothy is diagnosed with a chronic fatigue syndrome
• The Accurate Conception, which isn't a Dorothy episode, but had some great Dorothy moments, especially when Sophia revealed that Dorothy was conceived behind a sausage and pepper stand during a festival
• Mrs. George Devereaux, when Dorothy was pursued by Sonny Bono and Lyle Waggoner
• What a Difference a Date Makes, when Dorothy learns that Sophia made a fateful decision which resulted in Stan
• Goodbye, Mr. Gordon, when Dorothy falls victim to her long ago crush on her high school teacher
• Journey to the Center of Attention, when Blanche became threatened by Dorothy's hold over the male patrons of the Rusty Anchor
• The Commitments, when Dorothy pawns off a blind date on Blanche, and ends up with 'George' from a Beatlemania group
• One Flew Out of the Cuckoo's Nest, when Dorothy finally got regular, fantastic 'so good they named it' sex and a new husband.

So many great lines; so much sadness because their ranks are thinning.

Stan - gone.
Sophia - gone.
And now, Dorothy.

Amber's words coming out of Rick's mouth

First things first...

Way to put Eric's dick problems on blast, Donna!! Disclosing Eric's difficulties in front of your sisters, one of which is Eric's ex-wife and current daughter-in-law... you should've told Brooke to 'camel' it. Despite Brooke freaking out about one night without Ridge between her thighs, we women are known for going without sex for long periods of time, unless the concept is foreign to Logan women.

Going from bimbo to brains, gotta give it to Steffy; she dumped Rick, but not before giving him quite the tongue-lashing. She called him on his broken promises to mend fences with her father; his 'attempt' to better himself by joining the military; the chicken clucking; the ways he threw Phoebe's death in Ridge's face; and his basic @$$hat attitude. It was fascinating watching Rick trying to regain his control over Steffy, especially how he tried to get all subliminal with her. Discouraging her from blaming her parents... Nutsack, please!!!! He was very Manchurian Candidate about it, but Steffy totally stood her ground and didn't fall victim to him.

Unfortunately, Brooke wasn't so lucky. No critical thinking; no referencing any of the other lies that Rick fed her over the last few months; no acknowledgement that Rick used the 'he wasn't thinking' excuse when he lied about his paralysis; stealing and giving away the Forrester line; and the numerous other things that tool has done. Being sexually backed-up can impair reason and logic, but it was one damn night!!! 'Camel' it or visit a toy store, but don't talk yourself into thinking that Ridge betrayed you when you know that Ridge's dick problem is a direct result of your skunk-@$ son. And while I don't like the idea of Taylor pining for Ridge, I couldn't help but laugh when Taylor resubmitted her application for Ridge reclaiming his place between her thighs right in front of Brooke. Daaaayyyyuummmm... talk about looking a bitch square in the eye as you knife her.

I've complained about the bipolar mood of the show; but this week's episodes were on target. It made the postponement of the inevitable Eric and Stephanie confrontation seem less relevant, although I hope the confrontation is coming soon. Steffy emerged as the most mature of the whole lot. And Rick came across as the cold, calculating bastard that he is. I think back on all of the tangles that Amber got herself into for the love and approval of Rick. Much like Rick, Amber, despite being the older one in the relationship, implored the younger one, Rick, to help her facilitate changes to major character flaws. Amber was wrong to ask Rick to take more responsibility for her than she herself was willing to do; however, at least Amber was earnest. Rick, on the other hand, was robotic in the wake of losing the 'love of his life' and proceeded with his primary task of reeking havoc on his mother's personal life.

Personally, I am shocked that B & B writers didn't drag this thing out; however, May sweeps is still sitting out there, which could mean some surprises. A possible pregnancy for Steffy? Will Rick remember that he's holding Thomas' future in his hand and decide to leverage it against Steffy? Will Eric find out about the recording? Will all of this behind the scenes drama drag Forrester Creations further down the path of ruin? My hope is that whomever responsible for this week's awesomeness continue the good work.

WORST PRESIDENT EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I wonder if Forrester Creations has a whistleblower hotline.

Or if the pilots have a union representative.

Because they, being caught between Ridge and Big Bad Pwesident Rick, was the height of absurdity.

But before diving into the Steffy/Rick/Ridge stuff, some clean up:

Jackie and Owen finally got down - meh! After sex, Jackie and Owen planned to get a bite to eat when Bridget showed up. Jackie decided to lend Owen out to Bridget because Jackie has it in her mind that Bridget still wants Nick (little does she know...) and that Nick peeping Bridget with Owen would send him into a jealous frenzy. Really, really bad plan, Jackie. Still don't understand Jackie. Am also not on board with Bridget either. Bridget didn't pick up on the 'just had sex/were we caught trysting' vibe that Jackie and Owen were giving off? How many times have Bridget walked in on her significant other and a trusted, older female giving off that very vibe? Seriously.

However, to Owen's credit, he did tell Jackie that he asked Bridget out several times; unfortunately, he didn't admit that he may still be interested. The question now is did Owen tell Jackie enough? If the shit hits the fan, does Owen have a loophole, since Jackie didn't hear him when he said that he made overtures towards Bridget?

Now... to the nitty-gritty...

Over the last few days, Rick popped off at the mouth, again, and Ridge recorded the whole damn thing. Rick, dissatisfied that his trash talk didn't get under Ridge's skin, doubled-back to Ridge's office and overheard Ridge and Taylor listening to his tirade. Freaked, Rick crashed Steffy's bridal shower and whisked her away for an impromptu romantic getaway. Ridge and Taylor got to the shower too late, as Rick just led Steffy out of the backdoor. Rick decided to take Steffy to Big Bear; Steffy got a call from Taylor and Steffy let it slip where they were going. Rick got pissed and snatched the phone from Steffy; he then came up with a plan to go to Hawaii. He called and arranged for the Forrester corporate jet to be readied for them. Unbeknownst to Rick, Ridge has to be notified whenever the jet is used, since he has the power to authorize the use of the jet. Ridge found out about Rick's plan and told the pilot not to take off. Pwesident Rick jumped bad and reminded the pilot that he was Pwesident; the pilot caved and attempted to take off. Ridge, with Taylor riding shotgun, drove onto the runway and chased the plane down. Taylor dragged Steffy off the plane, while Rick and Ridge traded barbs.

Now the surprising thing... the actress playing Steffy... Jacqueline MacInnes Wood, can act. I think that my opinion was colored by the Phoebe's death episode; I didn't buy her crying. She looked like she was straining. Lesson learned -you can't cry like Katherine Kelly Lang overnight. But back to Jacqueline... her Steffy looked like she was hit with a 2 by 4 with each progressively worse soundbite. She was hearing what Rick was saying but the wheels in her head kept trying to crank out excuses for Rick. It was nice seeing smart Steffy; unfortunately, it's still April, and I'm thinking that a breakup would happen through May sweeps. So, my fear is that B & B will be bipolar and Steffy will become dumb again, for the sake of a May sweeps payoff.

But still, my hope is that Steffy will find her inner Stephanie and smoke Rick but good. Now that I have more confidence in Jacqueline, I would love for this storyline to go in that particular direction.

And will somebody at Forrester Creations do some actual work?

Coincidentally...

the conclusion reached by news anchors, morning show hosts, reality show judges, etc. regarding the public's current love affair with Susan Boyle was a little pat.

Don't judge a book by it's cover?

Really?

Because, unlike the news anchors, morning show hosts, reality show judges, etc., the people at home probably know a Susan Boyle or are a Susan Boyle. Someone who has a talent or gift who was either sidelined by life's circumstances, velvet-roped out of feeling proud of one's own uniqueness or programmed to feel that dreams can come true if you dream small.

Last week, I listened to Thursday and Friday's episodes of CBS Early Show and learned several things. One, this Susan Boyle seemed to have a good head on her shoulders. Two, the morning anchors who were drooling over her were also giving backhanded compliments. Their sense of amazement over her lovely voice seemed a bit exaggerated, and quite frankly, insulting. Apparently, they never ran into a natural, authentic-looking person with a special gift in their daily doings. Three, Maggie Rodriquez and Julie Chen's attempts to 'relate' to Susan Boyle, as if either knew what it was like to live her life, were disingenuous. Fourth, Friday's segment involving the two non-Simon Cowell judges was a painful waste of time. Both personified why the reality show climate was ripe for the likes of Susan Boyle: narcissism and constant need to prove that they're more interesting, wittier, and astute enough to warrant the attention and money that they are getting -- they are not.

I remember when Simon Cowell introduced the ___ Got Talent franchise to America. He or another one of the producers claimed that this show was necessary because American Idol has an age cut-off and that they wanted to give a wider range of ages a chance to show off their talent. The fact that all three judges were surprised by Susan Boyle just illustrated that they never believed in their goal; they were hoping to find more of the cookie-cutter contestants that American Idol is known for.

My hope is that Susan Boyle will be successful, but also that she isn't disassembled and reassembled to fit into the show producers' concept of her; a Cinderella story. I also hope that Ms. Boyle's presence on the world stage continues to reveal how the high and mighty really feel about the invisible masses who support them via their viewership. The most disgusting example of this was Friday's Oprah episode. Oprah fucking Winfrey has been on my shitlist for many years now, but her behavior and attitude put my disdain for her over the top. Instead of commenting on Ms. Boyle's voice, Oprah chose to zero in on Ms. Boyle's hosiery and shoe choice. She also added that she will book Ms. Boyle on her show, which I guess, is supposed to make up for her and her panel's rampant display of superficiality and inability to enjoy something that is still pure, despite the approaching overexposure.

Good luck to you, Ms. Boyle.

My Benjamin Button fast - week 3 (done)

A lesson learned: you can't blog and do 5 7 6 at the same time, or rather, I can't do 5 7 6 the way I wanted to; nevertheless, I was satisfied with my choices.

This Sunday reminded me of the Sunday when I started this fast. I had to drive back to my hometown to babysit my toddler-aged niece. I needed music for the road trip and since the Benjamin Button soundtrack was out of the question, I chose soundtracks from The Wiz (movie) and Gigi. Little did I know that those selections would make my mind travel back to Benjamin Button.

The Wiz, like Benjamin Button, was subjected to unfair comparisons by so-called critics. While The Wiz is considered a cult classic now, its brilliance was overshadowed by critiques fixated on what the movie wasn't instead of what the movie was. For me, The Wiz illustrated the history of Black Americans and some of the quandries that many of us have to endure and truimph over. Being told to or being bullied into suppressing one's intelligence (Scarecrow); being consumed with the fear of outliving one's usefulness and having to face that realization through the eyes of a loved one (Tin Man); being so overwhelmed by circumstances beyond your control that you are rendered paralyzed with fear (Lion); and balancing the need to nurture and protect with the desire and subsequent fear associated with venturing outside of your comfort zone (Dorothy). There's also the need to avoid false prophets (The Wiz); going into bankruptcy due to vanity (Emerald City sequence); seeing oneself through the eyes of an opportunistic leech who can only see their bottom line (Evilene and her sweatshop workers). Of course, there are those who would just repeat "But where's Garland, Bolger, Lahr, and Haley?".

As for Gigi... the age difference between Gaston and Gigi was pretty ticklish, like Benjamin and Daisy for the majority of BB. Mind you, Gigi could be construed as decidedly seedier since young girl Gigi was being prepped by her grandmother and great aunt to be Gaston's courtesan; but MGM had a knack of painting a pretty picture over something unseemly, as demonstrated by the numerous ways they tortured Judy Garland in order to bring corn-fed Dorothy Gale to life.

At any rate, I look forward to what else will leech out in the coming weeks.

Hunny Bear's got the blues?

Bold and the Beautiful can be worrying at times. First, I think that there's a continuity issue when it comes to the mood of the characters and the scene sequences. There is also a major problem with the Rick storyline, mainly that the writers aren't giving the supporting players (Tylo, Moss, Cook and Lang) enough to work with. A lot of hand-wringing is going on which is made all the more ridiculous since Taylor, Ridge, and Brooke have a good 20 years on Rick (Eric has what...40?) and they all have been up against much worse nemeses. There is no way that any of them should really be rendered powerless.

Kyle Lowder is an expert in playing in unrepentant bastard; after all, he played a very similar character on Days of Our Lives. But the problem seems to be that the writers are afraid to allow their established characters (Taylor, Ridge, Eric and Brooke) a 'go there'. The best part of the Brady Black baiting was that this brought the worse in established favorites like John, Roman and especially Marlena. It was refreshing to see the icily refined, level-headed Marlena smacked the crap out Brady, shoved him into a wheelchair (dude was on crutches after suffering a gun shot wound to his spine), and took him into a private room and try to school him about how things are going to be in the household. Marlena's foot rarely slipped, but seeing that, you kinda wanted it to slip more often. And even when Brady had someone in his corner (his sister, Belle and potential love interest, Chloe), they could see through his crap and happily call him on it. At any given time during Brad Black's reign of terror, he was held accountable by somebody. For some reason, the Bold and the Beautiful writers aren't doing very much to make Rick's reign of terror a little more bumpy, which is a mistake.

At any rate, Thursday and Friday's shows were... something. They weren't as enjoyable as I hoped, but here are some highlights nonetheless:

• Jackie and Owen continued their pun-filled (versus fun-filled) flirtations, which culminated in foreplay broadcast over speakerphone to Stephanie and Jackie's son, Nick. Okay, I get that Nick's an adult, but EWWW!! And Nick is older than Owen... double EWWW!!! Risky sex can be exciting but not in front of sonny-boy. And given all of her years at Forrester, Stephanie would know the sound of someone getting their rocks off during a business day. Again, I can't stand Owen and I really don't understand Jackie.

• Brooke has a pow-wow with her sisters about her relationship with Ridge. She's worried, as she should be. Brooke may be a chemist, but she must have never heard of Pavlov. Beings can be trained to react to positive and negative associations. And since, lately, Brooke has used sex to try to end arguments with Ridge regarding Rick, Ridge's cock got the message -- Brooke's dewy flower brought forth King Douchebag; Dewy Flower tries to distract me from KD. Flower... bad!!

• Rick attempted to persuade Taylor to dummy up about his relationship with Steffy, since he's convinced that he's thisclose to driving a permanent wedge between Ridge and Brooke. And Taylor seemingly mulled that suggestion over. Listen Taylor... loneliness is better than Rick using and potentially destroying your only surviving daughter, especially when loneliness is an easily resolved problem. And there are plenty of men worthy of loving; Ridge really isn't the be-all and end-all.

• Stephanie gave Felicia and Thorne a heads up about her new job at Jackie M.; they were conspicuously absent from the Jackie M. viewing party held in Eric's office.

• Taylor went to Ridge's office and expresses how gung-ho she is to get Rick out of Steffy's life (see what I mean with the bipolar-type moods the characters seem to possess?). Anyway, it was reassuring to see that she retained (or regained) her senses. Ridge explained that the computer can record anything uttered in his office. Sadly, dude couldn't push the button fast enough, since Rick insisted on doing one of his verbal drive-bys with a quickness. Rick just loves talking dirty... to his fiancee's father. For once, someone overheard the verbal diarrhea; unfortunately, Taylor's credibility hasn't been as set-your-watch-to-it as it used to be. Taylor leaves; Rick comes back; and Ridge got the recording on.

• Steffy, Eric and Donna watched the fashion show. Everyone, except Steffy, knew that Bridget is Madame X, so she was puzzled by Granddad/future Father-In-Law's enthusiasm. Jackie revealed Madame X's true identity and announced that 'another Forrester' will be joining their ranks.
  

Of course, the other Forrester was Stephanie, news that Eric didn't take too well, despite Donna's cheer leading. And personally, I didn't care for Stephanie saying 'Eat your heart out, Hunny Bear'; it was so Team fill-in-the blank/bitter princessy. And I really didn't care for Bridget reprimanding Stephanie for it either; if I was Bridget, I would be more than a little salty about Jackie referring to me as "Eric Forrester's daughter". But regarding Eric, he must have thought that Stephanie was blowing smoke about getting another job, although I must confess, when Stephanie told him that and he raised his eyebrow, I pictured Stephanie dressed as a candy stripper,a la Days of Our Lives' Alice Horton (BTW... I love you Alice Horton/Frances Reid, wherever you are). It really emphasized how out of touch Eric seems to be, at this point in his life; it also emphasized his arrogance as well. Eric assumed that Stephanie would 'take one for the team', in terms of allowing her silence/absence to be interpreted as affirmation for Forrester's current creative and administrative direction. What he fail to realize that Stephanie merely followed the lead of her non-Ridge children, who had to leave Forrester in order to foster their own visions and skills, along with getting some sort of individual recognition.

And yet again, the so-called faces of Forrester (Ridge, Brooke, and Rick) were grappling with their own personal drama instead of being ahead of the curve when it comes to Jackie M.

My hope is that the writers will allow Stephanie to see this new phase through. If she and Eric get back together, which I kinda don't want, please allow her to keep whatever her Jackie M. partnership, or whatever she earns, and not try to merge it into Forrester. She seems better when there is a significant space between she and Eric.

But the potential confrontation between Stephanie and Eric next week... woof!!!

Stick to the weather, dude!!

Every morning, my routine consists of watching ABC World News Now, followed by NBC's Early Today. During the Early Today's entertainment segment, the Vanity Fair poll regarding the world's most beautiful woman was mentioned; Angelina Jolie was the winner, followed by Gisele Bundchen and Halle Berry. After the anchor read the results, there was a sorry attempt at banter between she and the weatherman, which resulted in the weatherman asking about Jennifer Aniston.

Jennifer Aniston.

What the fcuk does she have to do with this poll? Oh wait... Angelina topped the poll, therefore Jennifer Aniston is relevant, why...?

Weatherdude... Angelina and Aniston are not conjoined; therefore whatever happened with or to Angelina doesn't happen to Aniston.

For future reference, Weatherdude, here's the breakdown of the Vanity Fair poll result.

58% - Angelina Jolie
9% - Gisele Bundchen
4% - Halle Berry

Jennifer Aniston didn't even rank.

It's an online poll, Weatherdude, therefore it's safe to assume that some overeager fans spent a lot of time voting for Angelina, or it was just a matter of that face speaking for itself. Or maybe, Vanity Fair has a 'what have you done for me lately' attitude. And since the last thing that Aniston did for Vanity Fair was back in 2005, with the infamous 'missing sensitivity chip' article, it may not have been in Vanity Fair's best interest to curry further favor from her.

No more dumped chick handouts for Aniston. Life shouldn't Stuck on You, on a loop.

The role of "Bold and the Beautiful" will be played by... "Bold and the Beautiful"

Thank goodness -- today's episode wasn't an advertisement for Macy's. The B & B writers really need to work on the subtlety and maybe, pawn off the responsibility for plugging Macy's on somebody not Steffy. In the few months that I've watched, the actress that portrays Steffy has been saddled with the responsibility of plugging things not B & B - related; a few months ago, she was plugging some kind of vegetable charity. Have nothing against Macy's or vegetables, but give the product placement a rest.

Next - Taylor saying that she'll do "whatever it takes" to get Rick out of Steffy's life conjured images of Brooke and Deacon. In my opinion, Taylor don't have what it takes to be calculating and ruthless. She needs a master - Stephanie- but Stephanie is otherwise occupied. However, Ridge finally figured out that he needs to record Rick's verbal diarrhea. I mean, seriously, dude... when he said he owned father-daughter @$$, I would've been on the interoffice phone with Jake, getting my office wired to the hilt. Of course, Brooke gets peckish, but freeing Steffy is more important than Brooke's ego. Or, Ridge could go to a security expert and acquire some special 'pens' that can go anywhere that Ridge goes.

Glad to see Thomas. He's yummy with that haircut. Young, but yummy.

As for Brooke, I think that she is really burying her head in the sand where Rick's concerned. To me, Rick is a combination of Deacon and Brooke's brother, Storm, and we all know what happened when their behavior went unchecked.

Can't stand Owen; dude's a whore!! But at least he and Jackie weren't flirting today. Their flirtings were very painful. And what exactly does Jackie do at Jackie M., besides running the company into the ground and promoting random dudes just for the chance of getting young beef.

As for Jackie M. and Nick and Stephanie's partnership, I really getting stoked about this. But the thing that got to me was Clark. I've been worried about his place as Jackie M., since Jackie has taken to dissing his work left and right. But the scene when he and Stephanie were talking about whether he would keep his job... it kinda got to me. Given the current economic climate and how it's currently affecting me, it was refreshing to see someone on B & B worrying about their future. I didn't worry about Owen because he's only been on the scene for five minutes, but Clark has a long history. I'm glad he's sticking around.

But the best part of today's show was the reintroduction of fun. B & B has been pretty depressing lately, mainly because the Logans have become the new pivotal family, but the sparks between Stephanie and Nick and maybe even Clark could usher in some fun that's been sorely lacking due to Darlene Conley's death and the phasing out of the Spectras. Make no mistake... the Spectras had their share of drama, but they were flawed, hungry with ambition, crass, at times, and just fcuking fun. Stephanie doesn't need to become Sally (no one could be Sally), but there is a golden opportunity that the writers of B & B would be stupid not to explore.

An average Macy's commercial -- I mean, Bold and the Beautiful episode

I understand that money's tight on all fronts, but couldn't the writers have tried harder to hide the Macy's plug in Steffy and Rick's dialogue?

There was a glimmer of hope for Steffy today -- she actually demonstrated that she could think. She actually had the nerve to question whether Rick's motivations and his love for her were genuine. He talked her out it, but there is a chance that the wheels in Steffy's head could still be churning.

Stephanie joining Jackie M. has the potential of being a pretty good storyline. I am concerned about the potential conflict between Jackie and Bridget over Owen, but I am hoping that Bridget will be the playette instead of the played for a change.

I can't take Brooke's cluelessness and her blatant jabs at Taylor regarding Thomas. Clearly, Brooke is getting her Rick on by disrespecting Ridge, who is getting his Eric the ostrich on.

And does anyone at Forrester actually work? Eric and Donna can dine al fresca; Rick, Steffy, Ridge and Brooke can make a trip to a beach; and Taylor can drop by and carry on a prolonged conversation about Rick and Steffy with Ridge and Brooke. Since Rick gave away a collection to Jackie M., you would think that Forrester would be running themselves into the ground to catch up. Meanwhile, Jackie M. is beginning to resemble a company where their employees actually work.

Levi Johnston has his say; some lady entertainment 'journalists' don't like that

On CNN's Reliable Sources, there was a segment about Levi Johnston and his recent interviews with Tyra Banks and the CBS Early Show. Howard Kurtz, along with Inside Edition's Deborah Norville and Amy Argetsinger discussed the relevance of the story, whether the interviewers did a thorough enough job asking follow-up questions, and the changing priorities of morning show interviewers due to fierce competition. While Norville, very accurately, pointed out that CBS's Maggie Rodriquez failed to ask probing follow-up questions, there wasn't any acknowledgement of Rodriguez's unprofessionalism. There was a decidedly snotty tone when she spoke directly to Levi, as if she resented the fact that Levi was doing the interview in the first place.

There has been other instances when Rodriguez's bias shined through, specifically any story pitting Jennifer Aniston against either Brad Pitt or Angelina Jolie. The most vivid example was when Marley and Me was the number 1 movie over the Christmas holiday. Not only did she gloat about this so-called victory, she downplayed the importance of award nominations that Button secured, stating that box office success was more important. Of course, I haven't heard her lamenting the box office success of Paul Blart or Fast and Furious, although they topped the box office too. Of course, she did crow about He's Just Not Into You, another Aniston vehicle. And she did try to diffuse the Burger King Square Pants controversy by reminding the audience about the Friends episode when Ross and Rachel rapped Baby Got Back to their baby daughter, as if the presence of Aniston can and should cancel out any objections parents should have about the commercial. Personally, it would behoove the CBS Early Show to chip in for an Aniston exorcism, given that Maggie can't stop herself from interjecting Jennifer Aniston into any discussion.

Then there's Showbiz Tonight's Brooke Anderson who took major exception when Levi opted to talk about his breakup. There was very little acknowledgement of Bristol and Sarah Palin talking about this on Fox; how the more liberal part of the media used Levi's Facebook or MySpace profile page to paint him as some careless child-hating horndog who knocked the Republican VP candidate's daughter; and the subsequent reports about his personal and family situations like his mother's arrest and his quitting a job that Palin procured for him. Seems to me that Levi had plenty to address about himself and his situation and it seemed ridiculous that Anderson had a problem with it. Anderson has no problem moderating discussions about the Bachelor debacle, especially when the discussion was pro-dumped chick Melissa. Or any story discussing actresses' failed love lives. But it's totally wrong for someone without the access to receptive media outlets to accept an offer to discuss his side of things?

To me, Levi didn't come across as some opportunistic douchebag, although it's too early to stake anything on this assessment. He's a 19 year old kid who stated his position; it's time for him to get off of the Hollywood talk circuit. If he stops talking at this point, he will be in a great position. If he doesn't try to become an actor or model in Hollywood, it'll be even better. He is good-looking enough to do some modeling, but not necessarily runway/Paris stuff. If he's smart, he would consider pursuing opportunities associated with outdoor sports; I'm sure that there are high-end sporting gear catalogs who need attractive, yet authentic-looking men to showcase their products. Or he can strike up some kind of deal within Alaska so he can be near his child.

As for the Andersons and Rodriguezes of the entertainment press, it's time to retire the Team Dumped Chick T-shirts and make an attempt to accept that men have just as much right to clear the air as women do. And since Levi hasn't channeled Fred Durst, Jason Mewes, Michael Bergin, or John Mayer, when it came to Bristol, then there shouldn't have been a whiff of sanctimonious princess squawking.

My Benjamin Button Fast - week 2 (done): 5 7 6 weekend

Week 2 is done and surprisingly, it's getting a lot easier dealing with the Benjamin Button drought. Sure, some scenes still crop up in my head, especially when I'm doing my boring-assed job, but removing the BB tracks from my MP3 player has squelched some of the mind-wandering. Substituting some other music tracks on my player and just craving some variety, in terms of movie-watching, I took advantage of my local video store's everyday special: the 5 7 6.

5 general release movies for
7 days for
6 bucks

This locally-owned video store is huge and there is no doubt that if my first choices aren't available, I will always find something interesting. The following were my initial choices:

Meet Me In St. Louis - because of tracks from the That's Entertainment box set. I was reminded of Garland's charm that I had to rent my favorite Judy Garland film. If the video store didn't have it, Harvey Girls or Summer Stock would've been my alternatives.

Fight Club - because it's a Fincher flick and a perfect illustration that a Fincher audience has to watch his films very carefully to get more out of it.

Sons of the Desert - because I'm still feeling good about I Love You, Man. Mind you, the character dynamics in Sons of the Desert is decidedly darker than I Love You, Man, but it serves as a nice contrast. Plus, Mae Busch thoroughly rocks as Ollie's wife.

Jeff Dunham - because his purple puppet is so freaky-looking

Mystery Science Theater 3000 - because it's always a good default choice. Teenaged Strangler or Time Chasers would be the ones for this go-'round.

Well, getting two out of five choices seemed unusual, but I got them on a Friday, so it's not that surprising that someone else scored my first choices. However, the alternatives really hit the spot. The following are the movies I wound up with:

Meet Me in St. Louis - gotta say, I really liked how the DVD was packaged. I haven't watched the bonus features DVD, but was thorough pleased with the feature presentation. Plus, it was a nice reminder of Garland's talents, along with Margerat O'Brien's hilarious performance as Tootie.

Fight Club - I couldn't get the deluxe edition, but the basic DVD suited it's purpose. It's still amazing to me how I continue to find clues that I have missed over the last 10 years. For example, I noticed that, possibly, Jack projected some of Marla's physical attributes onto Tyler (spiky hair, vintage clothing, the smoking, the sunglasses, the weird fur coat, etc.). I also noticed that my initial contention that Jack gave Marla the same card that Tyler gave him was wrong; but I do think that the card given to Marla had the same drawing on the label of some of Tyler's soaps. And the business card (with Tyler's name on it) had a picture of two male angels facing each other. The angel on the left seemed to be talking to the more passive angel on the right. Throughout the movie, I began noticing Tyler and Jack's position within the frame; whomever was on left was in charge, unless the person on the left was in the background. It's still a fantastic film to watch.

Keeping Up Appearances - the comedy combination of Patricia Routledge and Clive Swift serves as a somewhat suitable substitute for Laurel and Hardy and Hardy and Busch. While Hyacinth Bucket isn't abusive like Busch, she does give her husband the blues. Hyacinth's Hardy-esque pompous and oblivious air and Richard's Laurel-like unwavering loyalty, along with well-executed slapstick comedy, promises many laughs. Discs 5 & 6 feature the Buckets going yachting, golfing, shopping for country cottages, and numerous other misadventures.

Hud - a classic flick I've never seen before. It starred Paul Newman as Hud, a very selfish bastard so determined to steamroll over his father for the family cattle ranch. Loved Melvin Douglas as Homer, Hud's father. Although I was firmly on the side of Homer, I couldn't help having my head turned by Newman's Hud. I can't stand that type of man in real life, but I could fry pancakes on my lady parts after watching that movie. Woof!!!

Some Like It Hot - Garland's vulnerability lead me to Monroe's. I really loved Marilyn in this flick. And Jack Lemmon just rocked the $h!t of the Jerry/Daphne role. I really miss Jack Lemmon.

I have no idea if I will do the 5 7 6 thing next weekend, but it is likely that something else will crop up while I try not to think about May 5th.

Get off Christina's back!

Last week, breast cancer survivor Christina was photographed puffing on a cigarette on a street, which compelled bloggers and NY papers to reprimand her. But the question is... do these news outlets have a right to criticize her behavior? Personally, I say no. I'm not a proponent of smoking, but for these news outlets to ignore that smoking is a major part of the HW culture and that Christina probably started this habit when she was really young, it's ridiculous to assume that Christina could quit so easily.

And to be quite frank, Christina did not sign up to be the face of cancer. It's safe to assume that if the National Enquirer hadn't violate her privacy and exaggerated how grave her condition was, she probably would've gotten treatment on the QT. It was likely that she would've tried to go through this in a way similar to her mother. Maybe she would've disclose her condition when she was in a better place mentally and emotionally, but she really wasn't given a chance.

Christina has been the latest victim of the media turning against a celebrity for not doing what what pundits recommend. Patrick Swayze got a small measure of this treatment when the National Enquirer published pics of him smoking; fortunately for him, it died down quickly. But the most glaring example of this phenomenon is Rihanna. She was physically attacked in private and yet, her attack became a media free-for-all. Showbiz Tonight had a revolving door of female entertainment 'journalists', therapists, and attorneys practically silk-screening domestic T-shirts on her behalf. And when she did the unthinkable, the machine shifted and they called in the big gun, Oprah, to add her two cents.

Like smoking, taking back a man capable of such brutality is not a good idea, but neither is crowding a person who is going through a personal trauma for some sort of personal/professional payday. From February to now, a lot of people got a lot of television face time critiquing what frightened, emotionally compromised people should do. I hope that Christina doesn't enter their crosshairs.

Some overdue vindication

Princesses are very funny people. They think by the sheer power of their 'charisma' they can have anything and everything in the world without working for it. However, it never occurs to them that they can lose it just as easily with their sheer laziness, insipidness and unwillingness to see the world as it really is. If something bad happens to them, it's someone else's fault -- no acknowledgment of their shortcomings; no attempt to take responsibility. That's why I hate Jennifer Aniston; not once did she take anything resembling responsibility regarding her marriage falling apart. She was a sunbathing, coke-snorting princess, who talked about the pitter-patter of royal prodigny coming any day now while taking job after job after job, while noting that working and pregnancy wouldn't be a good mix for her. When the royal marriage fell apart, she diverted attention to Angelina Jolie, naturally, because the princesses love to pawn off their disappointments, fears and suspicions on her, for no other reason that she's beautiful, smart, and lushly sexual. Aniston, the crusty sunburn scab that she is, was not the first person to pin all of the responsibility on Angelina; Laura Dern started it all and finally, this week, the lynchpin of the princesses' argument about Angelina is gone.

This week, Billy Bob Thornton demonstrated that when he has a singular vision about how things should go, he follows it to the bitter end. By acting like a douchebag during his initial interview with Jian Ghomeshi, he compromised his band's reputation and livelihood. And unwilling to leave well enough alone, he proceeded to further insult a Canadian audience, which could've affected Willie Nelson, the actual headliner of the tour. So, mercifully, the Boxmasters, and Billy Bob bowed out of the tour, but this hardly over.

Theoretically, people are supposed to mellow as they age; if this conduct is indicative of a 'mellow' Billy Bob, then what the hell was he like 10 years ago when Angelina 'allegedly' did the unthinkable and hooked up with him? Angelina readily admitted that she placed herself in a psychiatric hospital and Billy Bob got her out of there. Two (admitted) cuckoos hoofed it to Vegas -- that should've been the end of the story, but Laura Dern had to open her mouth. Laura Dern was with him for a few years; she knew what she had and knew whether it was worth complaining about after she lost it. It is my opinion that she knew what a d!ck he was and instead of breathing a sigh of relief both privately and publicly, she decided to whine about it. A whine that began a part of American pop culture lore. A whine that made a stronger impression than anything she ever did on television or in film. A whine that lends some credence to the belief that Laura Dern was one of those princesses who thought that she could change a man by the sheer strength of her charisma.

Angelina and Billy Bob divorced, thank God. Angelina never went into detail about why, thank God. Billy Bob, on the other hand, talked about beauty personified being as fcukable as a couch, thank God. This, along with his unwillingness to be a father to Maddox, made any public acknowledgement by Angelina seem charitable. Angelina grew up and probably scored the greatest catch of the century, Brad Pitt. Brad seems to be doing his thing - adopting and having babies with Angelina- but most importantly, being a father to them. A lucky escape for Angelina and Maddox.

Now, I can totally see Billy Bob screaming at a 7 month old Maddox to not call him 'Daddy' but 'Rock 'n Roll God'.

Errr... you're not that young, Donna!

A brief B & B summary for the last few days:

• Owen and Jackie flirted; Jackie rented a loft; Owen and Jackie flirted in her loft
• Owen and Bridget has a business meeting on the beach; they flirt; they surf; they make out; Bridget reveals that she is damaged
• Nick visits Taylor; he feels sorry for Stephanie; he convinces Taylor to be there for Stephanie
• Stephanie walks on a beach; she visits Taylor; Taylor begs her to move in with her
• Nick drops by; Stephanie gets pissed; Nick offers Stephanie a job; Stephanie gets even more pissed
• Katie skulks about, pissing off Jackie, just because she can
• Eric successfully gives a statement about an employee leaving Forrester; Jarret (sp) gives him a WTF look when he confirms that the employee is Stephanie
• Donna, the Twinkie, tries to step into the Grand Dame role, and succeeded in looking like the clueless, out of her element bimbo that she is

So yesterday, there was a commercial showing Stephanie vowing retribution to both Eric and Donna at some restaurant; this made me very angry, since I was hoping that Jackie M. hiring Stephanie would be the ultimate, unexpected d!cksmack to Eric, if this was kept a secret until, say, the next fashion show (May sweeps) or something. But no... the writers decided to not maintain the suspense at all. I hated that they did this, until today's episode.

Donna, taking the mike, and saying 'Out with the old; in with the young' with regards to a fundamental change to her husband's company -- oh, yeah... that trick is cruising for a bruisin' and per usual, Eric did nothing to stop or diffuse this major faux pas. Personally, I wouldn't be surprised if this arrogant and ignorant statement from Donna will be the impetus for Stephanie to change her mind about Jackie M. Add to it the possibility of Katie opening her big mouth to certain people (Brooke) at Forrester, and possibly, Brooke taking it upon herself to dissuade Stephanie or even Nick, from going into business together.

But back to Donna... where the hell does she get off acting like she's as youthful as rose pedals? She has a 20-something son; and while she had no hand in raising him, therefore no teenaged mother/rough life stress marks on her face, she is hardly Deanna Durbin. She's in her mid-thirties -- that is not young. It's younger than Stephanie, but it's still not young. Therein lies my beef with Donna.

It's fine that a woman is in great shape and takes care of herself. It's fine if she enjoys getting looks or compliments for her hard-earned physique. But what singes my @$$ is women who buy into the 30 is the new 20 or 40 is really 30-10 crap. What the hell is wrong with rocking the $hit out of your 30s and acknowledging that you are in your 30s? Or your 40s? Or your 50s? If old films are an accurate gauge, women were, at one time, hung up on turning 30, so they stayed 29. The problem was compounded if she was single and '29'. It seems like there was a small window of time when women admitted their real ages, relished the compliments for taking care of themselves, and actually conveying youth and wisdom at the same time. Tina Turner, and to a certain extent, Cher, were the embodiment of that idea. But in recent years, that concept has deteriorated, as demonstrated by the Jackson/Timberlake Super Bowl debacle. You can't out-Twinkie 20-something twinkies; any 30/40/50/60-something with a bit of sense knows that. Stephanie knows this; clearly, Donna doesn't because she still sees herself as a 20-something twinkie.

Donna's smugness made me think back on something. I apologize to faithful fans if I jumble this up because I was channel-surfing back then. Anyway, I seem to remember Stephanie and Sally Spectra getting liquored up together. I'm pretty sure they were drinking to something ending (maybe Spectra was going under or Brooke was marrying either Ridge or Thorne, or whatever) and I think that a drunk Sally cut off Stephanie's hair. After the buzz wore off, Stephanie decided that along with a corrective haircut, that she's not going to be, in her words, 'a bottle blonde' anymore. After a brief montage, Stephanie went from blonde to the silver-haired barracuda that we know today. I remember this because I always felt that the blonde wig that Susan Flannery wore was distracting. Also, I think it was the first time I ever saw a female soap character seemingly embracing a reality of life - everybody ages. And, in my opinion, Flannery's silver hair brought out her other facial features, which were still pretty lovely.

This is why I want Stephanie to bounce back and not in the First Wives Club/Team Aniston/ditched Bachelor 'fiancee' kind of way. Stephanie is better than manufactured princess bull$hit. She is tough, smart, and due some hard-earned respect. If that means that Susan Flannery will rip the scenes apart, that's even better.

The Brady-Bundchens: My... we think a lot of ourselves, don't we?

Looks like I spoke too soon.

I assumed that Gisele reluctantly consented to being photographed by paps in order to smooth over the princesses' ruffled feathers after the 'Thomas is mine' comment in Vanity Fair. Turns out that not only did Gisele not consent to being photographed in her second bridal gown, her security emphasized her position by opening fire on some photographer's car when the paps refused to surrender their cameras and memory cards.

The question is... was it really necessary to start shooting, especially when these people posed no risk the the Brady-Bundchens, since the photographers were leaving the premises? Given that this story is being downplayed, while the paps trespassing at the Jolie-Pitts chateau last summer story was blown out of proportion?

Open gun play in the wake of a second wedding versus smacking the shit out of a camo-wearing photog with a walkie-talkie who tried to ambush newborn twins?

My Benjamin Button Fast - week 1 (done)

Last weekend, I decided to stop listening to my Benjamin Button soundtrack both at home and at work, in preparation for the May 5th DVD release. It's been a week since I've been Benjamin Button-free and quite frankly, it's tough.

Despite the campaign attempting to paint Benjamin Button as a Forrest Gump redux, I found this film to be among the more compelling fare offered by an American filmmaker in the last 20 years. Sure, film reviewers glossed over the fact that the film cover the span of a man's life and marvelled at the special effects executed in this film, but their critiques seemed short-sighted on so many levels. I read that reviewers were disappointed that the movie wasn't more emotional; my question to them is whether they can discern between emotional and manipulative. Another issue is the lack of active viewing on the part of these reviewers; I questioned whether they really watched the film, since I haven't read anything close to the conclusion that I arrived at; more than anything, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button is an intricate puzzle involving Benjamin's origin and how the people who created him and subsequently abandoned him (whether by choice or by death) impacted his opportunities in life and the choices he had to make, more than the people who actually loved and raised him.

It was the fastest moving 2 hr 46 min film I ever watched -- so much so that I watched it numerous times in the theater. And when merely watching it wasn't enough, I bought the soundtrack, which made the replaying of the film in my mind more vivid. The monotonous paper-pushing I do during the day went by much faster, but I had to stop listening to the soundtrack because memories of the film was too close to the surface and I was afraid that I would ruin things for myself.

Home entertainment is a beautiful thing; maybe if the more vocal critics would watch this film, beyond the studio-subsidized screenings, without a snark-seeking agenda, then they could probably see that a character archetype that was historically used as a pawn received a redemption, of sorts, that was long overdue.

I don't like my Stephanie defeated

On Friday's episode of Bold and the Beautiful, the full scope of Stephanie's firing finally sank in for her. The result was another great performance from Susan Flannery. I was very fortunate to record this episode, despite the CBS bulletin concerning the shooting in Binghamton. I just enjoy watching and listening to Flannery's Stephanie; however, I took exception to some of the things she conceded during her talk with Nick. Such as:

• Her contention that Brooke Logan is a 'force of nature'. Angelina Jolie is a force of nature; Stephanie Forrester is a force of nature; Brooke, on the other hand, is nothing more than a blonde, baby-voiced chemist who knows how to push male buttons.

• Her contention that Eric is strong. Eric is anything but strong. Like Brooke, he is incredibly pliant, especially when it comes to anything involving his bits. If he was so strong, he wouldn't have hooked up with Donna on the private jet and insisted on telling Stephanie about his going back to Donna until after the family Christmas party. Stephanie could've handled being told sooner rather than later; Eric is the one who couldn't handle doing the telling until he had Donna securely back in his bed.

While Stephanie was appropriately reflective about this situation, Eric continues to be oblivious to the scope of his decision. Stephanie will be alright, hell, she survived how many strokes, and recovered brilliantly. But Eric has one heart attack and a bout with Aunt Pam's lemon bars, and the dude is seriously running scared.

A line from Fight Club comes to mind when it comes to Eric and Stephanie's relationship-- she protects him while he sleeps. And since Eric has embraced his inner ostrich by protecting Rick's corporate espionage, accepting Rick's relationship with Steffy, and continues to have Donna 'contribute' to Forrester Creations, his company will continue its slide.

Eric is the understanding parent, maybe even the favorite, but when the Forrester children, including his and Brooke's kids, are in serious crisis, they go to Stephanie. There may be periods of estrangement or animosities, but they turn to her nonetheless. Eric has foolishly underestimated this fact and my prayer is that the writers at B & B will let this estangement stick so that both Eric and Stephanie will recognize her worth.

Coincidentally...

• Fast & Furious had the best opening weekend so far this year. But does this means that Vin Diesel and Paul Walker's engraved invitation to the Oscars is a lock, assuming that they continue to pay tribute to the successful movies of the award year?
• People has a cover story featuring The Bachelor's Melissa. Seems to me that if you voluntarily signed up to compete against a herd of women for the love of a stranger, you should expect some bruising, pride-wise, not incessant tabloid covers about how you 'bounced back'.
• Why is it that whenever the tabloids claim that Angelina is pissed off at Brad, they claim that she exiles him to the couch? Given how large the estates these two lease whenever they are working and/or traveling, you would think that there is a spare room available for Brad to camp out in.
• Interesting how the paps were able to get clearer pics of bride Gisele during her second go-'round with Tom Brady. Is this a consequence of Gisele's recent Vanity Fair interview, since silly princess types will put aside their indignation in order to oh and aww over wedding pics?
  

Jennifer Aniston: How can we thank you for John Mayer?

It was bad enough that we had to endure four years of 'feel sorry for me but not too sorry because it's creepy' claptrap from Jennifer Aniston, despite her being the one who filed for divorce. Now, the American public has to endure John Mayer, her recent ex who, like Aniston herself, refuses to keep the old cakehole shut. While Mayer's random disclosures could prove to be fun, it's still coming for Mayer, and I sooner not see or hear anything else from him (the same goes for Aniston).

Mayer is guaranteeing that the price for his paparazzi pics won't plummet by 'dropping' little bombshells. Like writing love songs which may be about Aniston. Or finally admitting that he made out with one of Aniston's sworn enemies... Perez Hilton?!!!

Anyone who read Perez Hilton knew about the frenching incident; it happened while he was dating Jessica Simpson back in '07. But what is Mayer's agenda for disclosing this now? Where was the honesty when Mayer made the off-color comment about Brad and Angelina's sex life back in '06? Or his propensity to give golden showers to the women who foolishly slept with him? Or when he began his comprehensive blog series about what constitutes being a douchebag (citing Brad Pitt as an example) which was put on pause when, 'surprisingly', he began dating Jennifer Aniston within weeks of the post?

Jennifer Aniston is not the dupe that she likes to project. She is not a victim in any way, shape or form. Post-Brad, her 'serious' relationships were with men with big mouths and crass dispositions. With these bulls in china shops, if something happens that is potentially embarassing and/or damaging, the burden of public criticism will land on the men -- never on her. And instead of questioning why she would associate with such men, the focus shifts to Brad Pitt, the man responsible for setting her free into a dating world in which she attracts and date subpar men. Actually, the focus would go to Angelina Jolie for motivating Brad Pitt to set Aniston free into a dating world in which she attracts and dates subpar men.

Despite Jennifer Aniston filing for divorce.

Marvin Gaye was killed 25 years ago today

Not gonna dwell on his musical legacy or issues with drugs, since these are attributes I don't share with Mr. Gaye. However, I do know about dealings with a parent who seems jealous or threatened by their child's talents. I also know about dealing with a parent who believes that he/she is all-knowing and all-seeing. That attitude, more than the effects of a brain tumor, was the motivation for Mr. Gaye Sr. killing his child.

Members of my community continue to perpetuate the lie that the Black family is the foundation for everything, but they fail to acknowledge that if the Black family is sick down to its core, continuing to associate with the poisonous and indoctrinating the subsequent generations to it don't serve anyone.

There are a lot of discussions to be had about this; unfortunately, the concept of abandoning dysfunctional Black families is taboo.

Stephanie NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!! Wait - HELL YEAH!!!

Haven't posted anything Bold and the Beautiful for a while, mainly because I'm grappling with Rick's declaration that he owns father-daughter @$ (gag!!!). A residual effect of last Friday's show was my immediate stoppage of recording Bold and the Beautiful. A regretful move because I missed the awesomeness of Eric firing Stephanie today. ERIC FIRED STEPHANIE?!!! That dude is officially on glue.

Eric 'fires' Stephanie because she's divisive - yet Rick's president after sleeping his way through the Hayes-Forrester family, killing a Forrester granddaughter, giving his father's fashion line to the competitor because he wanted a 'fresh start', free of Forrester drama (look in the mirror, douchebag) and of course, the infamous father-daughter @$$-owning thing.

Eric 'fires' Stephanie because she isn't contributing anything except negativity - yet he keeps Donna around who can create or conceptualize a fashion line to save her scrawny, skanky life. Well... she also seems to have honey on hand - I suppose that's something.

Eric's children, who actually contributes to Forrester have been pi$$ed for months, will be even more pi$$ed about this and sadly, Stephanie will not be around to talk them down from the ledge. GOOD!!!!

Many viewers don't like Stephanie because she is a meddling, controlling battle ax; me personally, I LOVE HER FOR THAT. Because nine times out of ten, she is right and she has a way of righting things. Rick isn't focused on Forrester Creations; he is focused on sticking it to Ridge and Steffy (father-daughter @$$ - shudder). If Stephanie was around, then Forrester Creations has a slightly better snowball chance of finding the right course again. But ERIC FIRED STEPHANIE- fcuking dumbass!!!

However, there is a light around the corner. Jackie M. is looking around for someone to add additional credibility to their brand. Jackie popped off to the banker about Bridget; Bridget popped off to Eric about her new position at Jackie M.; Stephanie would be the perfect showstopper for the Jackie M. fashion show, AS PRESIDENT... the job that Rick tried to buy his way into with Eric and Ridge's designs. It would be poetic justice if Stephanie got that gig. She earned it, via her many years trying to cultivate the working environment at Forrester. And I would love for Stephanie and Rick to go head to head; Stephanie would totally rip his cheek off with her bare teeth and spit it back at him.

And as for Eric, let Turd Sr. continue to bury his head in the sand, or more accurately, in Donna's rack. And I pray that Stephanie's exile will last because Eric needs to learn that Stephanie was worth more than merely being his fallback/muscle.